March 16, 2010
I read a lot of blogs these days – although I still hate to admit that I am a reality tv junkie, I have limited the amount of tv I watch and increased the amount of blogs I read….I guess that’s not so bad.
I found Ashley Brooke Designs through another blog and became an instant fan – her work is great, she is beyond classy and she loves what she does (I love that about business owners!). Ashley focuses not only on her business, but sharing tips on etiquette with her readers. I asked her to put together a post on what she thought were the things every bridesmaid needs to know…Take it away Ashley!
Okay so here is the deal, the real deal… being a bridesmaid can go one of two ways, horribly wrong or oh-so-right! I myself have been in my fair share of weddings and fortunately for me I’ve loved every second of it!
The fact of the matter is that being a bridesmaid is an honor, truly. To be selected to stand up next to someone while they commit their lives to loving another is a BIG deal! And unfortunately for some, that part, what I consider the whole part, might be overseen.
And let’s face it, being a bridesmaid is a lot of work! Your schedule fills up quickly with showers, dress fitting, if you have a DIY bride on your hands, craft time, and the list goes on… I know all of these things seem tedious at times, but to the bride, they are life and death moments, and moments that create a friendship that can’t be broken. To quote my mother: “NO one, trust me, no one cares as much about the wedding as the bride does!” this is the quote she used to say to me all the time when I was in a wedding and when I was planning my own. This always put things into perspective to me. And as a former bride I get it, for those few months may they be short or long (in my case it was 4) you are bombarded by decisions to make and whether you handle stress with poise or not, these decisions take up most of your free time thinking. So when it seems like the “bride” can only talk about her wedding and upcoming events leading up to the wedding, it is because she is up to her nose in wedding decisions. So yes, being a bridesmaid is important because really your not just a girl in a matching dress…you are a therapist!
And, call me a sap, but I loving being a bridesmaid, I loving being there to see what I call the true love moments. The moments right before the ceremony starts and the bride gives one final deep breath before she sees her groom or the ridiculous grin the groom gets when he sees his bride, or the quiet but sweet glances between the parents of the bride. These are the moments I love to be a part of. These moments are the moments that make all the rest of the stuff worth it! So remember that when you are up to your knees the night before putting together the brides hotel gift baskets…it is worth it.
Here are a few quick tips to make being a bridesmaid easy as pie:
1. Be excited for the bride.
2. Remember the dress that she picks out is not important, what is important is that she picked you!
3. Show up for your bride! Be at all the pre-wedding events you can, including showers, parties, etc. You are part of her support system.
4. Be understanding, and willing to listen.
5. The day of the wedding is a sometimes insane so your #1 goal is not to let the bride feel any of the insanity that might be surrounding! So if that means you are running back and forth around the hotel to get things done in heels with half of your hair done… do it! It will be worth it!
6. And lastly, enjoy this day for her. This day is her most special day.
So it is simple, showers and dresses aside. If you strip away the stigma of a “bridesmaid” it is really something simple. Friendship in it’s purest form.
Thanks Ashley for sharing with us! Head on over to Ashley’s Blog to check out her amazing designs and more etiquette tips!
Continue to Elevate,
K.
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Great advice! I’ve only been a bridesmaid once and I could definitely have used this advice before I did. Luckily I did have experience as a bride, so I knew what she was going through.
Being there for events if possible is something that I found particularly important as a bride and a bridesmaid. One of my BMs flew down from SF for each and every one of my events and it meant the WORLD to me (I told her I’d understand if she didn’t want to). So when I was a BM and living in Sac (for an OC wedding) I made it my priority to be there in planning activities, showers, bachelorettes, you name it.
Thank you for your sweet introduction at the begining of this post! You are both so fabulous!
xo- Ashley Brooke
YES! I was a red bride as well.