Tales of a Nelywed: The Newlywed Nine

It exists! You’ve heard of the freshman 15 but you’ve probably heard less about the phenomenon of the Newlywed 9.

I won’t sit here and pretend to be a weight loss expert and try to tell you ways to avoid the nasty nine – that’s not my job. I will however give you my story in the hopes that you won’t go down the same road.

It’s common knowledge that people in love gain a couple pounds at the beginning of their relationship. Something about being totally comfortable with the one you’re with and all. Well, I’ve been with my husband for nearly eight years so that stage has long past. This sudden increase in my waist line is attributable to a few other things.

First, I lost a good amount of weight for my wedding. Dieting and working out every day for the two months prior to my big day made the pounds come off quickly. But after the wedding, after the honeymoon, after the big move… my strict workout and diet regimen just never found its way back into my schedule. Even though I’ve been trying to work out regularly my diet is nowhere near where it was pre-wedding.

Which leads me to my second point: Since getting married and becoming a stay-at-home wife, I’ve taken my role as June Cleaver very seriously (ok, not serious. I’ve been complaining and making fun of this for some time but you get what I mean). That means I’ve taken on all the cooking and grocery shopping for the two of us. But somewhere along the way, I lost track of June and found Paula instead. In my excitement to have dinner ready for my husband every night and my resolution to become the best home cook in the south, I began watching a bit too much of Ms. Paula Deen and, well, I agree, everything does taste better with a little more butter. This is also tied into the fact that because I’m at home a lot more now, I find a great cure for boredom is baking and making homemade ice cream (mmmm….)

The good thing about the newlywed nine, at least in my case and this is absolutely a result of my home cooking, is that I’m not alone in my weight gain. The hubs has put on a few pounds as well which both comforts me (because as long as he’s gaining weight, he won’t notice my larger rear end) and makes me feel a little bad about my new cooking habits. But with almost a year of wedded bliss under our (tighter) belts, we soon won’t be able to use the “Newlywed Nine” as our excuse so it’s time we make a concerted effort to lose it together – or just come up with a fun new alliterative phrases to blame. Second-year Sixteen??

Love,
Mrs.